I can’t stop fantasizing about my teenage son’s BEST FRIEND – I know my husband is getting suspicious but I just can’t stop myself

Dear Jane!
My 19 12 month outdated son lately returned from college for the summer season season and launched one in all his finest colleagues to come back again with us to our lake home.

They’ve had an essential few weeks of enjoyable on the water and hanging out at residence, and I’m so excited to see a house that is stuffed with power and enjoyable.
These days, nonetheless, I discover myself wallowing in fantasies about my son’s boyfriend.

It began with a sequence of innocuous concepts…watching how good-looking and suntanned he regarded within the tub, commenting on his cute mannerisms and useful perspective…but now I can’t stop falling for him after I’m alone or have a spare second.
Dear Jane, I can’t stop fantasizing about my 19-yr-outdated son’s finest pal – and I’m afraid it’s going to break my marriage
I discover myself blushing when he talks to me and each time he approaches me I actually really feel like I’m on a fire.
I am a 47 12 month outdated woman and this girlish habits is beginning to be seen by my husband and my daughter who’ve been asking me what is occurring.
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There is no means I would betray my marriage or my son in response to any of those concepts, but I have develop into fairly obsessed and just can’t stop.
Please inform me how finest to eradicate these concepts.
Author,
The Reluctant Mrs. Robinson
Dear Doubtful Mrs. Robinson!
The nice information is that the summer season season is nearly over, and I assume that after your son and his Benjamin pal are gone, pressured separation might also mean you can have some wholesome psychological separation.
Until then, it’s best to use a cognitive-behavioral technique to actively change concepts that are not doing you any good.
This therapeutic method reveals us that how we understand a scenario impacts how we really really feel about it, which in flip impacts how we act.
Thinking in another way about your crush will change your entire expertise.
You do that utilizing the three C’s: Catch, Check, Change.
Practice noticing when you’ve got ideas about your crush and whether or not these concepts are useful or reliable, then resolve if you happen to’re into them or not.
Once you have determined that you just just do not need to assume the identical means, you can also make a dedication to exchange that thought with one factor that is a lot more healthy and fewer dangerous.
Finally, take the last word aim out of this youthful man and place it in your particular person life and your husband.